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Solutions for Marital Sexual Problems: Overcoming Sexual Rejection and Emotional Issues

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Questionnaire for Solving Marital Sexual Problems: Overcoming Sexual Rejection and Emotional Issues

Having an honest conversation about sexual issues is an important first step toward strengthening your relationship and resolving problems. A questionnaire can be a useful tool to better understand each other’s feelings and needs. Below is an example of a questionnaire regarding sexual issues, along with solutions based on the responses to each question.

Sexual Issue Questionnaire

  1. Do you experience any discomfort or pain during intercourse?

    • Example answer: "Yes, I feel pain in my vagina during intercourse, and it’s uncomfortable."
    • Solution: If this response is given, consider possible causes like vaginal dryness or other physical issues, and it’s advisable to visit a gynecologist or sex therapist. Discuss using lubricants or hormonal treatments.
  2. How do you feel emotionally when thinking about or engaging in sex?

    • Example answer: "I feel stressed when I think about sex. It's no longer enjoyable like before."
    • Solution: In this case, emotional causes like stress, anxiety, or emotional distance in the relationship should be considered. Having open conversations between partners to reconnect emotionally and seeking therapy with a sex therapist might be necessary.
  3. Do my expectations or pressure about sex feel burdensome?

    • Example answer: "Not really, but sometimes I feel burdened if sex is requested too often."
    • Solution: Adjust the expectations surrounding sex to avoid overwhelming your partner. Focus on building sexual intimacy in a mutually agreed manner and refrain from pressuring your partner. Establishing emotional intimacy first is key.
  4. Are there ways we can be more intimate without engaging in sex?

    • Example answer: "I think holding hands and talking often is enough."
    • Solution: Try more non-sexual ways to increase emotional and physical intimacy. Simple things like casual massages, everyday conversations, and sharing interests can greatly enhance emotional closeness.
  5. What are the main reasons you refuse sex?

    • Example answer: "I refuse because of pain or discomfort. It’s scary to even start because I know it will hurt."
    • Solution: First, address the physical issues. Hormonal therapy for vaginal dryness or treatments for sexual pain should be considered. It’s essential to focus on resolving your partner’s discomfort rather than pushing for sex.
  6. Are there any other reasons why you don’t want sex?

    • Example answer: "It used to be enjoyable, but now I just don’t feel interested."
    • Solution: If sexual interest has diminished, it’s essential to explore this aspect. As people age, sexual desire can naturally decrease, so seeing a sex therapist or undergoing tests for hormonal changes might be necessary. Emotional stability in the relationship should also be a priority.
  7. What can I do to make sex more enjoyable for you?

    • Example answer: "I would like you to be more considerate and start more gently."
    • Solution: With this response, it’s important to approach sexual intimacy with more tenderness and emotional connection. Prioritize pre-sex physical intimacy, focusing on building an emotional bond slowly.
  8. What kind of environment or preparation do you feel is necessary before having sex?

    • Example answer: "I need a comfortable and safe atmosphere. There has to be trust between us."
    • Solution: Feeling emotionally secure during sex is vital, so ensuring trust and comfort between partners should be prioritized. It’s also important to work on strengthening emotional connection outside of sex.
  9. How do you feel after intercourse?

    • Example answer: "I sometimes feel satisfied after sex, but sometimes I feel anxious."
    • Solution: This response warrants a deeper exploration of emotional reactions post-intercourse. It's important to identify the sources of anxiety and address them. There may be past sexual trauma or other emotional factors involved, so consulting a therapist may be helpful.
  10. What kind of approach would make you feel more comfortable when I suggest sex?

  • Example answer: "I’d appreciate it if you approached me gently, without making me feel pressured."
  • Solution: It’s crucial to avoid pressuring your partner when suggesting sex. Respect her emotions and find a comfortable, non-pressuring way to approach the topic.

Solutions Based on Your Partner’s Answers

  • Physical Issues: If there are complaints of vaginal dryness, pain, etc., seek medical advice for solutions. A gynecologist can prescribe hormone treatments or lubricants, or you may consider therapy with a sex therapist.

  • Emotional Issues: If emotional distance or anxiety around sex is an issue, deep communication between partners and regular counseling may be needed. Rebuilding emotional intimacy should be the first priority.

  • Differences in Sexual Desire: As people age, sexual desire can change. Understanding each other's differing sexual desires and finding new ways to build intimacy without pressure is important.

  • Sexual Pressure: To reduce the burden around sex, instead of forcing it, find ways to engage in intimacy that both partners are comfortable with. Approaching the situation with respect and care for each other's feelings is vital.


This questionnaire helps partners understand each other’s sexual problems and find the appropriate solutions. The most important aspect is the willingness to solve sexual problems and the mutual respect and consideration within the relationship.


Note: The above content is general guidance. For accurate diagnosis and treatment tailored to individual situations, consulting with a professional is essential.


Resolving Marital Sexual Issues: Overcoming Sexual Rejection and Emotional Problems in Relationships

Resolving Marital Sexual Issues: Overcoming Sexual Rejection and Emotional Problems

Solutions for Marital Sexual Problems: Overcoming Sexual Rejection and Emotional Issues

Solutions for Marital Sexual Problems: Overcoming Sexual Rejection and Emotional Issues


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